This Floating Excrement Was Far Too Symbolic! These Are the Television Letdowns of the Past Year.

As we consider the television landscape of the past year, a selection of series emerge not for their excellence, but for their notable failures. From awkward sequels to bafflingly poor docuseries, here are the productions that had us scratching our heads or just reaching for the remote.

And Just Like That

How to start with this divisive follow-up? Burdened with woeful scripts, painful character development (we demand better for Miranda!), and a paltry 71 seconds of fan-favourite Samantha, the series struggled to justify its existence. Briefly, as the final series started, it seemed as if it had finally hit its stride. Then arrived an episode centered on Seema’s natural deodorant. Little surprise the creator declared this would be the final season. It ended on a low point; the closeup of Miranda’s toilet full of poo was simply too on-the-nose. Yet, viewers certainly had a hoot picking apart every single “what on earth?” moment. And as Carrie – once again single – danced around her palatial townhouse to Barry White, who couldn't release a small sob?

All’s Fair

‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? Of course she can’t.’

But that was almost the smallest of this show's problems. The recipient of a very rare no-star assessment, it was hard to know where to begin enumerating the problems. The laughably leaden writing? The mind-numbing veneration of wealth and materialism? The seemingly deliberate procession of tropes? Acting so bad they felt almost spiteful? Let’s just say “all of the above” and never speak of this series again. However, a second season has been ordered, so we’re likely going to have to.

AKA Charlie Sheen

Given the restraining orders, abuse claims and fatherly failures, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a bad boy. Not that you’d truly have gleaned it from this multi-part documentary which smirked its way at Sheen’s various episodes of reckless hedonism while struggling to tell us a single thing we didn’t already know. Rather, it felt as if this volatile personality was being pandered to, so any pity this show might evoke should be reserved for the people who have had to endure close contact with this charming but dismissive egotist.

The Iris Affair

Of course we understood it was preposterous from the outset: a drama about a supercomputer known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either solve global crises – or annihilate all of humanity. We stuck with it out of pure love for its stars … but by the end, it felt like even they had stopped bothering. One barely cared when his character died, and the other ended up hacking Charlie with an axe … in super slow-motion. That's what you call giving up the ghost.

The Gangster Drama

Dodgy figures convening in empty boxing gyms? The Prodigy’s Firestarter jackhammering away in club scenes? The late 90s called and wants its crime drama back.

In truth, that is harsh on the crime shows of the late 90s. Many look a little dated now, but at least they didn’t endure the ignominy of having to indulge baffling dialects. But there were plenty of other problems. Primarily that it was just really boring; a conflict over narcotics territory between various cockney picaresques which seemed rather simplistic.

With Love, Meghan

Considering the degree to which she grinds the gears of the nation’s ostentatiously angry commentators, it’s almost tempting to applaud the Duchess of Sussex’s various forays into twee homemaking as deliberate provocations. But then you watch them and are forced to admit that actually, they might have a point. It’s like watching a lifestyle magazine animated; a poster for wine o’clock with delusions of grandeur; a procession of snoozing dogs, humming beehives, Hallmark sayings and pointless crafting “hacks” you’ll not remember instantly. All underpinned by vast, largely unearned wealth. Ugh.

Victoria Beckham

There are obviously fascinating things to be said about both Victoria Beckham and her journey with career, self-image, self-acceptance. But for whatever reason, this documentary series chose not to say them. Instead, the viewing was like reading a marketing brochure. She clearly has every right to bridle at what she describes as her “miserable cow” image. But unfortunately, she didn’t do herself any favours with this guarded non-event of a series.

The Inheritance

It should have been the next cultural phenomenon – except even camper, with a glamorous star playing dead and a well-known personality overseeing her inheritance. What more could you want? As players battled it out, there was plenty of backstabbing and arguing. But the rules quickly became incomprehensible: it’s still too complicated to explain what precisely was happening. Even more disappointingly, we only saw glimpses of the star via prerecorded videos. The show ended up reeking of a programme that was straining desperately to live up to something way beyond it.

The Lena Dunham Romcom

How do you follow a show that defined a generation? The expectation was immense for this starry romantic comedy about Jessica, a hopeful New Yorker who lands in London with a shattered romance. The star seized the opportunity by the horns and was a delight to watch, embodying Jane Austen levels of romantic notions. But it was all very glossy and, ironically, was insufficient. Plus, the sheer amount of famous friends involved felt uncomfortable.

Mitchell & Webb Are Not Helping

Not good enough to be ‘uneven’.

Given the shrewd inclusion of gifted emerging comics, expectations were high. But unhappily, most of it fell flat. A recurring sketch was a one-note joke milked to a dry pulp but recurring in every episode. One star seemed too ready to slip into a familiar ranting mode. The writing room sketches, in contrast, simply provoked the thought that they should probably have stayed in there a while longer.

The Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox

This retelling of the story of Amanda Knox was executive produced by Amanda Knox and pretty much exclusively presented the viewpoint of Amanda Knox. So, while there probably is an compelling drama to be made about the horrific 2007 murder, this was not it. The material needed to be handled sensitively. Instead, the series struggled painfully to find the right voice, lurching from strangely jaunty, somewhat stylised farce to ultimately, real-life horror. Complex? Perhaps. A complete mess? Very much so.

The Maths Genius Thriller

We admire the star … but did we believe him playing the most brilliant maths genius in history, a man so smart he’s on the verge of a breakthrough that could ruin society? No! This globe-trotting thriller about secret services spying on – and killing off – intellectuals honestly got more farcical by the second. Formulaic nonsense.

1000 Men and Me: The Bonnie Blue Story

This hagiography followed the content creator notorious for explicit exploits as she undertook her biggest challenge yet. What on earth would motivate her? What we craved was far greater examination of her true psyche, plus those of the men in the queue. They could at least have spoken to the now-famous mum who appeared to haul her son away from the queue. What we got was disturbing shots and absolutely no interrogation of her notoriety whatsoever. And to think, the documentary-maker has a young daughter too.